What Do You Say?

by Crissy
(Burlington, KY US)

My three year old is potty training. Well it is going so-so, with the exception of him playing with his business.(His man business..)

I am making lunch, and he is on the potty, and he yells to me,

"Mom why does my peter gets so tall?"

Editors Note:
That certainly puts you on the spot! What did you say? That is one of those tricky times that can be hard for parents to answer!

What a cutie he is! Looks like he has been having fun!

Thanks for entering our funny kid's quotes contest Crissy, that gave me my morning giggle!

Good luck,
Annie D :)

Embarrassed Dad - Funny Kids Quote

We were standing in a very long line to ride the elephant at the fair and the three kids were getting antsy.

Out of the blue my toddler said to his older sister, "You're a penis."

Everyone within hearing distance pretended not to hear. It was one of those, oh my gosh, that's so funny/absolutely not funny moments.

So much for teaching him correct anatomy terms!

Editor's Note:
Oh my goodness, that is the time you want to disappear and disown your kids! That's funny!

Thanks for entering our funny kids quotes contest!

Good luck!
Annie D :)

Dressing Room Dilemna

by Jessica Daniels
(Sanford, NC)

I was in the dressing room of a department store with my three children, Amanda, age 4; Heather, age 2; and Rachel 2 months.

Three kids in a dressing room is a bit much, but what choice did I have? I was alone and couldn't leave them outside. Amanda sat on the bench helping to watch Rachel as I tried on dress after dress.

Heather became bored quickly and began to wreak havoc. She kept opening and slamming the door to the dressing room. I asked her several times nicely to stop, but she continued. Finally, I hissed, "Heather, stop opening that door!"

"Why, Mommy," she replied?
"You don't want people to see your fat butt?"

Editor's Note:
Oh no! There is no such thing as tact in a two year old! I bet none of those dresses looked good after that self esteem bomb!

Thanks for entering our funny kids quotes contest Jessica,
Good Luck!
Annie D :)

UPS Delivery

by Beth
(Hastings, MN)

This happened at my son's home -

My son and his 2 boys, 3 year old Tyson and 5 year old AJ were just hanging out one day and the doorbell rings. T

yson goes to the door, looks out the side window and sees that it's the UPS man. I assume he is quite a frequent visitor at their house because Tyson says "It's the delivery guy again. Mom must have been on the internet again ordering more clothes from Victoria Secret's!"

Gotta love it. Kids are so innocent.

editors note:
Woops! That's funny! You can't hide anything from a five year old!

Thanks Bev,
Annie D :)

Driving Lessons

by Kathryn
(Laconia, NH)

My husband was driving us to the mall and our four year old daughter was in the back seat. It was just a usual drive when all of a sudden I heard my daughter say something. I couldn't really make it out, but then she said it again. Horrified, I realized as she kept repeating herself; "F*ckis, F*ckis, F*ckis, F*ckis."

It was like a nightmare! I turned around and asked her where she had heard that word, and she just pointed out the window and kept repeating. I still could not believe it. I just stared in disbelief, here is my little girl saying . . . well, that!

It wasn't until I looked to where she was pointing that I realized the car in front of us was a Ford Focus.

Editor's Note:
Whew! Wash your mind out Mommy! Just as well you were in the car and not a crowded Mall! I know many a parent who has pretended a child was not theirs when their child is running round singing rude words!

Thanks for you entry into our Funny Kids Quotes or Stories contest Kathryn! Great to start my day with a giggle!

Good luck,
Annie D :)

The Day I Decided To Get My Haircut.

by David Schlebecker
(Silver Spring, MD, US)

I used to have very long hair (I'm a dude by the way). One day I was taking my dog on our daily walk in the woods. A mother and her young son were walking by when the exciting boy came up to pet my dog. He then looked at me with a curious look on his face and asked, "are you a boy or a girl?" The embarrassed red-faced mother apologized and said "son don't be rude, of course she's a girl."

I then decided it was time for me to get my haircut.