Problem Solving For KidsProblem solving for kids is one of the essential skills a child needs to learn. In the course of my work as a psychotherapist and parent coach, a huge percentage of the issues adults are struggling with, are because they do not have the ability to solve problems effectively.
Many adults have shut down to the point where they are not able to draw on creative thinking processes, and the patterning for this happens usually starts as a child.
As a parent we are in the best position to teach our kids these kinds of skills and value their creative thinking. Unfortunately all too often parents and teachers have dis-empowered their kids by giving them rules to live by instead of processes to apply to a wide range of situations.
Children Are Conditioned NOT To Think!I see many children and adults who have been over conditioned to pay attention and do as they are told, so much so, that the ability to creatively think has been scared out of them.
One of my clients, Michael can remember being rapped over the knuckles with a ruler in school when his attention wandered.
He got to the point of being too frightened to think for himself and became a highly anxious young man who constantly felt he was doing something wrong. He was failing in college, and simply did not have any strategies to function under stress.
Many children have their creative thinking conditioned out of them. As a child I was forever being told to stop daydreaming. Day dreaming is creative thinking! - we should be encouraging our kids to daydream!
My ability to think outside the box, and work creatively is one of my greatest strengths. I was very lucky to finally get a teacher who encouraged me to use my day dreaming ability in constructive ways, and get my ideas down on paper.
Stress Kills Off Brain Power!Much of our inability to handle stress as an adult stems from our lack of skills to solve problems and think and act in new ways. When we are stressed, what we have termed the stress hormone - cortisol, floods your body - and guess what happens? Some of the neural pathways in our brain actually start to shrivel up! So the more stressed you are the harder your brain has to struggle to think your way to a solution.
Kids who are being bullied, struggling in school, or behaving badly, are stressed kids! They need strategies to find solutions, to help them build internal resources and find better ways to get what they need.
Stress in children can arrise during any major events in their life; moving house, new school, exams etc - and this is normal. It is our body's way of firing up to deal with critical issues. But chronic stress in kids is a really bad pattern to be developing. So many children I see don't have the resilience to cope effectively under pressure. The earlier they develop good thinking skills and build those neural pathways in their brain, the better they will function as an adult.
Problem Solving For Kids
As a parent we have a tendency to want to sort things out for our kids to spare them pain. It is so hard as a parent to see your child in distress, or feeling anxious about something. We just want to rush in and fix it up and make them feel better.
It's not that I'm so smart, it's just that I stay with problems longer.
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